Suspense.
And the producer of radio's outstanding theater of thrills, William M. Robeson.
We pause now in this gayest of all seasons for a little murder.
We interrupt the pleasing flow of heartwarming greetings and ageless hymns and carols for
a slight case of oxoricide.
We turn our attention from tinsel and gay ornaments and strings of colored lights to
blood as Herbert Marshall stars in Back for Christmas, a tale well calculated to keep
you in...
Suspense.
Happy Mrs. Carpenter?
Deliriously, Professor Carpenter.
Well then, how about another glass of champagne?
Nothing goes better with a happy bride than a glass of bubbly.
Nothing?
How about a happy husband?
That you have.
To us?
To us.
Forever.
Darling.
Oh, Herbert, I'm afraid it's all a dream and I'll wake up any minute and find myself back
in that drab little bookshop in Leicester Street searching for obscure volumes for absent-minded
professors.
Oh, so that's what you thought of me.
Oh, not you, Herbert.
You were different.
I felt it the first time you came into the place.
Pre-marital second sight.
You knew at that minute, I suppose, that I would whisk you off to America and make you
my wife.
Well, not exactly, but I'm awfully glad you did.
Do you think you like America?
I love it.
I thought, perhaps, after this lecture tour is over, I might try to find a connection
at some college or other and just stay on.
What would you say to that?
I say wherever you are is where I want to be.
Now, who in the world...
Who is it?
Bellboy, sir.
Just a minute.
Yes, what is it?
A letter, sir, for Mrs. Carpenter.
For Mrs. Carpenter?
Let me have it.
Here.
Thank you, sir.
A letter for Mrs. Carpenter?
Herbert, you were a widow, weren't you?
I mean, Hermione isn't still alive.
What?
What would heavens know?
But that letter...
No one back in England knows that I'm alive.
I'm not a widow.
I'm a woman.
I'm a woman.
I'm a woman.
I'm a woman.
I'm a woman.
I'm a woman.
I'm a woman.
I'm a woman.
I'm a woman.
I'm a woman.
But and alway woman, o' your daughter 받고.
Oh, sister, suppose that I'm married.
So let's forget it, shall we?
Have another glass of wine.
I've often wondered what she would like.
Who?
Hermione.
You never tell me anything about her.
I'll just as soon forget her.
She's not an easy woman to forget.
Dominating, always managing things.
The house, my wardrobe, my friends.
You might say she managed herself to death.
The
Yes, my only
Are you doing down here in the cellar?
Put in the finishing touches on this wine bin. Have you taken leave of your senses?
Yes, I dare say you have
Look at you the epitome of the absent-minded professor. Oh, I wouldn't say that well I would
What ever would become of you if I weren't here to look after you? I wonder and well you might
Have you any idea what today is?
Why Tuesday, I believe indeed and what is going to happen today?
Well according to your plans. We are flying to America on the nine o'clock plane
Precisely and the good knows are coming in for tea in half an hour and here you are digging a hole in the cellar
It is not a hole. It's a wine bin. It looks more like a grave to me
Yes, sir. My only no stairs with you now and get into some clean things. Yes, my only I've already dismissed the cook
You'll have to get the tea things ready while I'm taking my bath. Yes, sir. My only
bother to go to
Closing up the house and all and then and having to open it again when we get back for Christmas back for Christmas back for Christmas
Must you keep saying that?
We are coming back for Christmas
Supposing I were offered a position in an American University. Oh, no, well, they did ask me to come to lecture
That means I'm not very much
Americans would pay to hear any foreign to deliver a lecture one
But there's no use building dream castles. However, nobody's going to offer you a fortune in America
Of course the extra money you will get would be very handy when we arrive back back for Christmas
Precisely it's no good. You're making a joke of it. Oh
But heaven knows where you'd be today if I hadn't got a sense of time
Yes, her man get a move on
And be sure to straighten up the sitting room and get the tea things out the second best the good knows will understand
Yes, I'm on it. I'm going up to have my bath now. Call me when they arrive. Yes, sir. My honey. Yes
Some irony. Yes, sir. My honey 20 years of it 20 years of her money being right
20 years of personal management down to the smallest detail of which necktie to wear and how many minutes one egg should be cooked
20 years of slow strangulation
Which will only have ended in dull death
If it had not been for Marion
At least Marion was one detail that Hermione could not manage
Could not even imagine
The mousy proprietor of a bookstore proper ever so intellectual with her heavy horn rim spectacles
and the absent-minded professor but
Such things do happen sometimes
As they did that afternoon last summer
Good afternoon. Oh good afternoon. Isn't this mark come about?
Is it you miss Markham yes, Professor Carpenter would I say I didn't recognize you without your glasses why I
Thought you couldn't see a thing without I can't but you're not wearing them. Yes. I am contact lenses
Well, I must say must save what professor oh
I never realized what lovely eyes you have. Thank you professor and that frock it is so becoming
Well, once I decided to get rid of the home rim glasses. It wasn't too difficult to get out of tweed
It's a delightful transformation from cocoon to butterfly. Yes
Butterflies are not nearly as lonely as cocoons
You're lonely. I'm completely alone since my father died
Did you never think of Marion?
My father was a very remarkable man. I never found anyone who could measure up to him. So
What pity how long have you been alone for?
Well, I knew you were a widower. Of course the first time I saw you a widower
Oh, I can always tell it was the same with my father
There's a certain
Sadness in a man's eyes a sweet sadness. I think when he's been married and then a widower
I've never thought of it quite that way. Oh, I have your books
Books. Yes, the ones you ordered last week
That's what you came by for wasn't it?
Yes, I suppose it is I've quite forgotten the phototomy of falloid gamma phytites and coniferous shrubs of North America
Those are the ones you ordered aren't they?
Yes, thank you. You're very kind miss Markham
Why kind professor Carpenter?
Not many young ladies in bookshops who got out of their way to look up rare books from old professor Botany
Why you're not old professor Carpenter really you look
Besides I adore botany
It's my particular hobby. No, really you never told me that before miss Markham
I was afraid to
Always intimidated me. You seem so preoccupied
Yes, I suppose I did
Well, you might be interested in some specimens of alpine
Poli answers that were just sent to me by a friend in Switzerland
Switzerland why used to go there always for my holidays before the war you like Switzerland
Oh every part of it
The lake the mountains the beautiful spring flowers, especially the flowers
It seems that we have quite a lot in common miss Markham. I'm sorry. We haven't put before I am too
But perhaps we can make up for it in the future
Indeed we shall
So had it begun and one thing led to another as they will with two lonely people
The invitation to lecture America made a happy ending possible
While Hermione proceeded with her plans for the trip. I made my own plans quite different plans
Now they were all but complete everything was proceeding according to schedule my schedule
Even Hermione drawing her bath upstairs gave me the opportunity to phone Marion
Hello
Hello, dear
Are you all packed?
Not much time left
Excited?
Reckless
Heathrow aerodrome half past eight
I'll be there
I love you Marion
And I you Herbert
I'm sorry. I've got to ring off now darling. I'll see you at the aerodrome
Tonight and forever darling
Goodbye for a little
Goodbye
Herbert!
Were you talking on the phone just now?
Yes Hermione
Whoever was it?
Freddie, Freddie Sinclair
Did I hear you say something about seeing somebody at the aerodrome?
Why yes, I old old Freddie said he might possibly get out to see us off tonight
That seems very peculiar
But then all of your friends are peculiar
Yes Hermione
I thought I told you to change your clothes before the guests arrive
Yes Hermione
Never mind, never mind somebody just drove up don't let them in
Yes Hermione
Herbert!
Yes Hermione
Look out the window
There's Professor and Mrs. Goodenow
But who's that with them?
Why it's...
Precisely, Freddie Sinclair
Peculiar you should have been talking to him on the phone just now
When here he is coming up the walk
Yes isn't it?
But then as you say Hermione
All of my friends are peculiar
Not half as peculiar as you
Digging in the cellar now before we leave for America
Just look at yourself
Yes Hermione
But go and let them in
Yes Hermione
Open the door and stop saying yes Hermione
I think my dear I've said it for the last time
In a moment we continue with...
Suspense
Songs make Christmas and for this Christmas Eve you have a very special invitation from CBS radio
To raise your voice in all the old familiar songs in A Carol Sing led by Bing Crosby
On this festive hour long holiday show you'll also hear Rosemary Clooney, Maurice Chevalier, Sarah Churchill, the Paul Weston Orchestra and the Norman Luboff Choir
There'll be pickups of voices raised in Christmas song from far off corners of the world
Whatever you're doing this Christmas Eve
Wrapping packages, trimming the tree, entertaining friends
Add new joy to the evening as all of you sing with Bing
And now...
We continue with Back for Christmas starring Herbert Marshall
A tale well calculated to keep you in...
Suspense
Back for Christmas
Hermione was so positive we would be back for Christmas
That afternoon pouring tea for a few friends who were coming to say last minute farewells
She kept reiterating it
Now mind you Hermione don't let those Americans lure your husband with one of their fat university jobs
We absolutely must have you with us for Christmas
Oh we will be back I promise you
Oh it's not absolutely certain of course
Herbert what do you mean it's not certain? Of course it's certain
After all Herbert Elroy you've contracted to lecture for only two months
Quite right Freddie but then of course anything may happen
Oh Herbert adores being unpredictable
Now what other man would decide today, the very day mind you
Before leaving for America to dig a great hole in the floor in the cellar
In the cellar?
Yes for a wine bin
He's been talking about putting a wine bin in the cellar for the last two months
But he never got around to working on it until the last few days
A wine bin? Whatever for?
It's the only way to store wines you know in the cellar
Even temperature all that sort of thing
Indeed in that dance they'll all turn
A proper wine bin should be made of concrete
Mine will serve its purpose I believe
Oh there you are my dear men
They're impractical little boys at heart all of them
I don't know Hermione
Indeed they are but not all of them are fortunate enough to have as practical a wife as you Hermione
Oh not really
Oh yes my dear I know I could never have done what you've done I'd just go to pieces
Imagine Freddie all the things one has to do before such a journey
And Hermione's done them all all by herself
Oh yes Hermione is quite remarkable
Well someone had to do them and Herbert's no help
He's a lucky man to have you my dear
You realize that don't you Herbert?
Oh indeed I do you have no idea how well I realize it
Well we really must be going
So soon
Oh yes I'm sure even you have at least a few last minute things you must attend to
But don't forget you'll be back for Christmas if you may count on it
Bon voyage then my dear Hermione
Goodbye dear
Goodbye Hermione
Oh not yet Freddie
We'll make our farewells at the aerodrome
At the aerodrome?
Why yes
Herbert said you phoned to say you'd see us off at Heathrow
I phoned?
Yes just a few minutes before you arrived
But I couldn't have I've been out for a drive all the afternoon
Come come Freddie you may as well own up
I'll say look here old chap I don't know what you're trying to
You see you see Herbert can't even lie well he's red as a beetroot
Aren't you ashamed of yourself Herbert stringing poor Hermione along like that
Well I suppose the game is up I
It wasn't Freddie I was talking to Hermione
Well I don't see how it could have been
No I was well it was about a little surprise I was planning for you
How sweet and I have a surprise for you too Herbert when I bring you back for Christmas
Oh merciful heavens I thought they'd never leave
Oh we still have plenty of time
To leave the house in proper condition for our return
Now Herbert after you get that dust cloth over the dam port
You can help me with the teethings and the scullery
No oh no no not that way Herbert you're leaving wrinkles
Who's to see it my dear
Well I can see it and I don't like it that way
Yes sir very well how's this
A little better now let's get at the teethings no idea
Oh Herbert yes
What was all this nonsense about a surprise for me
Oh if I told you then it wouldn't be a surprise would it
Oh come now Herbert we're too old to play children's game
What is it
Well if you'll come down to the cellar I'll give it to you
In the cellar why in the cellar
Because that's where it is
Oh really Herbert you don't make any sense
Now help me with the teethings
But you will come down to the cellar
Well later Herbert if this time
Time there had to be time
But Hermione was meticulous
Had each cup to be washed and dried just so
And put away in the cupboard in his accustomed place just so
And the silver had to be carefully wiped and put away in his plush line box just so
And then once more all the dust covers had to be straightened
And the windows checked to be sure they were locked
And the time was running short
There now I think that's everything
Everything but your surprise
Will you come down to the cellar now
Oh can't you bring it up here
Oh no no that would be quite impossible
Oh it's so dusty down there and I'm all dressed for the trip
I know but it will only take a minute and you'll find it quite worthwhile I'm sure
Oh very well
She went ahead down the cellar stairs
As we reached the bottom I silently lifted a small crowbar from a nail on the wall
She stood in the middle of the cellar peering around in the ill-lit gloom
Well I don't see anything but that letter you've dug
That's it? It's in there
Where?
Look closer, step closer to it, right to the edge
Really Herbert?
Now do you see it?
A little large for a wine bin
But just right for a grave
The End
Back for Christmas? No Hermione, no Hermione
I'll never be back
You've planned it so well Hermione, you're so predictable, so practical
Even typing your letters and signing them with a neat cryptic H that I have learned to copy
I'll be your amanuensis, I'll write your friends for you Hermione
Through me you will tell them we won't be back for Christmas
And then you will tell them how much you like America and that you persuaded me to accept a teaching position
You will tell them that you may decide to settle there permanently
And then the letters will come less and less frequently until at last they will hear from me
And I will break the news to them that you have died in America
Then I will have my solicitors put this empty house with its sad associations up for sale
And that will be the end of the matter Hermione
Back for Christmas? No Hermione, no, no, no
No, no, no, not now, go away whoever you are, go away
Did I leave the front door unlocked? No, no
I say Hobart, where am I?
Just keep calm, keep quiet, they won't look down here in the centre, keep calm, they'll go away
Where can they be?
Perhaps they've popped round with a gel
We've passed Jesus
Perhaps it's the shop, there's something at the last minute
Not a man, is it?
I say shall I shout?
No, it might not be tactful
There's no harm in a shout
No, let's come in on our way back, Hermione said they wouldn't leave till seven
All right, only I do want a last drink with old Herbert, you know he'd be hurt
All right, let's hurry, we can be back by half past six
Half past six, there's still time
After that it was easy, put the finishing touches to the wine bin, dress fast, get out of the house before six thirty
Take the tube to Waterloo Air Terminal and the airlines bus to Heathrow all according to plan, Hermione's plan
But from here on my plan
Announcing the arrival of BOAC Flight 14 from Rome, Calcutta and Melbourne
Passengers will please report to custom
Darling
Oh Herbert
Right on time my dear, shall we check in?
Whatever you say
I felt safer in my life
The low smoking sign just went out, careful of the cigarette darling
Yes thanks
Ever been on a plane before?
No, you?
My first time too
Oh how nice, to enjoy your first experience together, I was worried
About what?
Well, you having been married once, nothing would be new to you
My darling it will be new, all of it
Is everything all right?
Yes thank you
Would you care for a pillow Mrs Carpenter?
Were you speaking to me?
Yes Mrs Carpenter, would you care for a pillow?
No, no thanks, I don't believe so
Well if you want anything just ring the bell over your seat
Thank you
Herbert
Yes dear
He called me Mrs Carpenter
That's right
But I'm not yet
Oh you will be tomorrow this time
But how does she know?
That's the way our tickets read, Mr and Mrs Carpenter
Why?
I wanted you to get used to being Mrs Carpenter, straight off
Oh Herbert, you're a dear, you think of everything
All aboard Dr. Pettit
Can I help you sir?
Yes please, Professor and Mrs Carpenter, we have reservations I believe
Oh yes, we've been expecting you sir
Now boy, take Professor and Mrs Carpenter's luggage up to their suite
You know, frankly Mrs Carpenter, you're quite a surprise
Your letter reserving the rooms was so thorough
I was expecting an older, more forbidding sort of person
My letter reserving the rooms?
Oh I, I wrote the letter my dear and I signed it Mrs Herbert Carpenter just as a joke
What a cunning old fox you are Herbert
Now that I think of it I am rather
Well Mrs Carpenter, we might as well kill the bottle as they say here in America
Darling you'll make me tipsy
That's what a bride should be, just a little tipsy
Herbert, this letter the bellboy just brought
Seems to be a bell of some sort from a building contractor in Kensington
Oh, some mistake no doubt
And addressed to me?
Well give it here and we'll get to the bottom of the matter
Madam, this is to acknowledge your order together with the keys to your house in Blanston Place
Our men had no difficulty in finding the place where your husband had begun the excavation in the cellar
But apparently he changed his mind at the last moment and filled it in again
What is it Herbert?
Our men will begin digging tomorrow and you may rest assured it will be a professional concrete line job
And will be completed in ampouche and your surprise Christmas present to your husband
We are happy to be conspirators with you in this thoughtful gesture
And hope that Professor Carpenter will be pleased with our construction of his wine bin
Very truly yours, Paul Holton Sons Contractors
What does it mean Herbert?
It means that Hermione was right
I will be back for Christmas
Suspense
Suspense
In which Herbert Marshall starred in John Collier's story Back for Christmas
Listen, listen again two weeks from now when we return with Russian New Year
A tale well calculated to keep you in
Suspense
Suspense is produced and directed by William N. Robeson
Heard in tonight's cast were Irene Tedrow, Ellen Morgan, Paula Winslow, Ben Wright and Jack Moyles
The musical score was composed by Lucian Morrowek and conducted by Wilbur Hatch
Looking for adventure, excitement, thrills and chills all without leaving the comforts of your own home?
CBS Radio answers your need every Sunday on most of these same CBS radio stations
With yours truly, Johnny Dollar
Johnny's a freelance insurance investigator, an old hand at wrapping larcenists and lovely ladies
And the author of the most imaginative expense accounts in history
His tales are guaranteed to keep you between chills and chuckles
And you'll find yours truly, Johnny Dollar, right on the job
When he tackles his next baffling case a little later on in the day
Ladies and gentlemen, don't let death take your holiday
The traffic death toll over these Christmas holidays will be more than twice the average for any other week of the year
Don't allow the holiday spirit, the rush and activity to make you careless
Stay alert, drive especially carefully
Remember, the best Christmas present is your presence
Stay tuned now for five minutes of CBS News to be followed over most of these same CBS radio stations by indictment
Thank you for watching